Angry James


Filbert - Don't eat that, James.

James - Shut up asshole.

Filbert - I'm serious it's been sitting out for days and has all varieties of shit on it.

James - What..... What. You don't think I understand that? You think I'm just going to haphazardly eat some shit thats been sitting out on the sink like I'm some kind of midget-eating chicken fucker?

Filbert - Calm down james. I thought you were going to eat it. I'm just looking out for you buddy.

James - I don't need your protection, nutsack. I am my own man. I make my own god damn decisions and you need to stop mothering me like some pot-smoking mother goose.

Filbert - James.. dude. I don't smoke pot. And really I'm just saying I thought you were going to eat that hushpuppy so I kinda freaked out.

James - God.... AAHHHHH! God fucking damn it! I wasn't even THINKING about eating the fucking HUSHPUPPY! I don't even LIKE hushpuppys! It makes me think of puppys! And telling them to be quiet! I don't understand it and I hate them! I hate YOU Filbert!

Filbert - (cries softly)

James - I'm sorry Filbert. Let's go have a hearty dollop of yogurt from the Hardees.

Filbert - Ok James. Should we take your car or mine?

James - (long sigh) I changed my fucking mind. You always have to ask some stupid ass question just when things are getting good. I just wanted a FUCKING DOLLOP of FUCKING YOGURT and you RUINED IT! God DAMN IT!

The End