Thursday, January 12, 2006

My Week in Jail - Day 3

Night 3 in the county lock-up was pretty uneventful. I'm getting pretty good at blocking out all of my "roommates" who never seem to shut up. I've never heard a group of people talk so much about so little. No one is more annoying that the white dudes trying to talk black to fit in. Piss test guy from yesterday is one of those. Last night after lights out the comedian guy was talking about a lunch date he has on Friday while out on work release.

Black dude - "So you gonna get yourself some pussy, man?"

Comedian guy - "No I don't even know her yet, I just met her before I came in here."

Black dude - "Fuck that shit man. I'd be like, 'Bitch I'm fixin' to get mine, so you better be fixin to get yours. I'd be fuckin that bitch right out in the open.'"

Piss test wannabe guy chimes in with his brilliance - "Yeah no shit man, I'd be like in the park and shit. I'd be like, 'Bitch, bend over', hehehehe, yeah man, right out in the open and shit, hehehe, shit, that's what I'm talkin about. But I wouldn't say that to my old lady though. I don't talk like that to my old lady. Hehehe. Yeah my old lady supposed to be brining me some money tomorrow and shit. Hehehe."

He kept going on and on. No one was listening to him. That didn't stop him. He kept talking. Later on he was asking another guy about a job at McDonalds so he could get out on work release. More genius came out of him.
"How long are the lunches man. 20 minutes? Shit man, I was hopin' for a half hour. You know, just to see my old lady. Hehehehe. Yeah man, that sounds good though man. Hook me up with that shit. Wish they had half hour lunches though."

Obviously he needed that extra 10 minutes to see his 'old lady'. Cause we all know it takes 30 minutes and not 20 to bend your bitch over in the park out in the wide open. But wait, he doesn't talk to his old lady like that. Nevermind.

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